“Porn Parade”
She was only sixteen
Looking for the California dream
Untouched so beautiful
Skin just like cream
Went to rehearsal
To shoot her first scene
Wound up in the back room
Down on her knees
Used to be kind of fun
But now she’s all used up inside
Made some money, bought some drugs
Lot’s of forgotten drunken nights
Tells her boyfriend lies
Can’t look him in the eyes
When she looks in the mirror
What she sees she despises
Sadie had it made
No, she never should have strayed
Innocence lost, look at how much it cost
Porn Parade, Porn Parade
As the camera starts to roll
This child Sadie
@ Lisa, So sorry we did not
@ Lisa, So sorry we did not get to meet you!
You will have to meet up with us at the next Woodshop get-together. :)
VS
Margo: I didn't recognize Val
Margo: I didn't recognize Val. I thought she was a dude. Too funny.
OMG Val that is hilarious!!!
OMG Val that is hilarious!!! I hope you post a pic of you as Paradime, I'd love to see that :D
Hey what happened with Kracker...too shit faced to sing or lost his voice?
@ Margo, I was dressed as
@ Margo, I was dressed as Paradime at Red Carpet Rejects night. One girl gave me a big ole kiss on the lips, and another one decided to 'check' if my parts were girl parts or boy parts. I guess its nice to have options (LOLOL)
Absolutely, by far, the best
Absolutely, by far, the best time in my life! I'm still swaying as I type. You all summed it up pretty well. The music was non-stop and amazing! I partied my ass off, but was able to get up early every morning and get going. The sail away show, the beach show and the Q and A were my favorite. I thought Cheli was hilarious when he showed up wearing flip flops, a bathrobe, lifejacket over that and a backpack filled with beer. He's nuts! At first I couldn't remember what I said to Kid at the photo, but after the tingling wore off, it came back to me. I missed the "epic fail" that was Kracker on Sunday, but I felt bad for him. Saw him on the plane coming home yesterday, he looked like hell. His keyboard player got pretty wasted. Kid hung out on the beach for a bit on Friday, I got a few good candid shots. The beach show was fuckin crazy...oops there I go swearing again...It was the most interesting mix of people I've ever seen, in a good way. We made so many friends and we are hooked!!! See y'all next year, ok, one more time, Mutha Fuckas!!!!
Cool, thanks rsms & Val..
Cool, thanks rsms & Val...will make a note of those things. Not TMI for me lol, nothing worse than being in a room with no windows for fresh air. I always bring spray with me when in hotels, had a bad experience (it was the husband, not me lol) & had to use hairspray out of desperation. LOL about the 2 chicks hittin' on ya Val, do tell...
Margo, I would tell the beer
Margo, I would tell the beer drinkers to bring a bottle opener with them, and keep it on you, b/c some of the beers were not tab or twist-off for the bucket-o-beers. The bartenders/waiters were constantly busy. Supposedly, the ship ran out of alcohol the morning we left. Delta airlines also ran out of booze, at least vodka. They kept saying "Man, this is like a Vegas crowd" he heee And I think it was Mr. Bart who posted to bring a wine opener if you need one. There was a liquor/wine store on the ship. No fridges in the rooms, tho (Speaking of Bart, were you hiding from us?)
I did not bring a power strip, but we also did not primp a lot with appliances (maybe that's why those 2 girls hit on me lol.)
I brought a portable cooler, foldable, but did not need it b/c that was one of our gifts. And I always bring matches or spray for the pottie (TMI??) The rooms are cramped, at least ours was for 3 ppl, so you don't want to stink everyone out Bwa haaa
Margo: I brought a cabana
Margo: I brought a cabana thingy but didn't need it. They had chaise lounges on the beach for the majority of people. But remember, it wasn't super sunny for us that day so I guess it might be needed if it had.
(continued III)
(continued III)
I see Val covered the Q and A session Afghanistan veteran story. Her name was Christy and she was from New Hampshire. She had 8 tours of duty. When she presented Kid with the flag, everyone began to chant U S A. It was very emotional and most people had tears in their eyes. I know for a fact Kid cried, too because Cedar and I ran into Christy in the cafeteria and Cedar asked her if how it felt to make Kid Rock cry? Christy told us she herself cried and didn't realize Kid had cried too until the security guard escorted her and told her she had made Kid cry. Christy was just the cutest Badass you ever saw.
I forgot to mention a couple of things in the concert portion on my post. Kid stood in front of a wooden boat set. It was huge and you could see it from the ship. Also, Bahamanian men workers stood on berms behind and next to the staging area. They watched the concert from those berms and danced along. I spoke with a couple of men working near the docking area and they all just LOVED the concert and the people. It was such a blast. What an experience for all.
I don't know if anyone saw a woman using three hula hoops on the beach. That would be me. Thanks to all who cheered me on. I was the regional hula hoop champ back in the day. It was hard to do the tricks on the beach. It's easier on cement but I did manage the one leg and two arm move. I had never shared with Cedar and JB that I could do hula hoop tricks. When a Sixthman worker was passing out hoops, I grabbed three and told Cedar and JB that I was going to fricken amaze them. You should have seen the looks on their faces when I began doing my tricks. It was priceless.
Well, Cedars is still at my house and is up. We are going to head to breakfast and she'll get on the road for home. That's all from the top of my head. I'm sure other memories will pop in my head and I will post them.
Thanks RSMS for the nicely
Thanks RSMS for the nicely detailed review, helps me imagine what it was like & it sounds like so much fun....though I don't know how you guys survived on 2hrs of sleep, I couldn't do that;) So...you think you'd like to go again next year? I hope so...reading your stories makes me wanna go BAD!!! Hey, I wanted to ask you guys while the cruise is so fresh in your memory, is there anything you're glad you remembered to bring or wished you would've brought on the trip? Love reading about everyone's experience :))
(continued II)
(continued II)
I met several of TBT band members. Funny story. Cedar saw Aaron in the casino and asked him if she could be pictured with him. He obliged. I took the photo and then he asked me if I wanted to have my picture taken with him. I said no thanks. After we left, I didn't catch it, but Cedar said he had a funny look on his face like a WTF look. I walked back to him and said, "I hope you weren't offended by me saying no thanks but I said that because I didn't want to invade your privacy." He had been chilling with his friends. He grabbed me with his right arm, gave me a one-arm hug, and then kissed me on my left temple. He was really sweet.
I met Stephanie earlier in the sail, again in the casino. I told her when she bangs on those drums in SO HOTT, it's amazing and I don't know how she does it. She politely thanked me and we chatted a bit. She was really cool.
We saw Marlon as well. He was playing craps in the casino. We just watched from the distance.
I saw Jessica by the elevators to the Lido deck. She is just beautiful. I told her what Cedar said about her earlier, that when Jessica moves, the only body parts that are jiggling are the ones that should be jiggling. She thanked me. Man, I cannot express how strikingly beautiful she really is and she was just as sweet as can be.
I shared an elevator with Aaron, Dave, and another woman who was with them. I just kept my mouth shut for some reason and smiled.
I never saw Ty Stone walking around. We wondered where he was.
Now, for cruisers. I noticed that people where genuinely polite. People held doors for each other, said '"excuse me" when they bumped into you or "pardon me" if they had to step in front of you. Kid had told us all at the end of the sail away concert, that we should treat each other like family. Kid, we were really good to each other. I don't know if you read this. I hope you do. People really do listen to you. You ARE the daddy of this dysfunctional family.
(Leave it to RSMS and I to
(Leave it to RSMS and me to write a novel, lol!!)
I ran out of space.
I ran out of space..continuing..we got a cooler, a Badass koozie and magnet, for gifts from CTM. There was a merchandise store open from 9:30 am till 11 pm, and it was always crowded that sold the CTM merchandise, and other tees. Ty Stone rocked again! He was there with his gf, I high-fived him in the water during the KR/TBT beach concert. Yelawolf put on a good show, and was good with the audience, but IMO has a lot of growing up to do when you saw him out and about. Sadly, not very friendly to our gang. Kracker was on our plane back :) I enjoyed his shows; he lost his voice at the last one. We were hoping KR would step in and help him out :) Paradime is very very funny!! And his crew is just as cool as he is. Jessie sang a song with Dime at his show; I believe it will show up on Dime's new CD when he has a chance to finish it. OK I'll let someone else go now.
RSMS was a trouper, gang. She
RSMS was a trouper, gang. She, JB, and Cedars were up until 5:30 am most nights. I couldn't hang ;)
More stuff: An 80-something Granny, Mary Jo, won the Lucky Bitch contest. She proudly displayed the Bird after she won. One of the cruisers made the most out of his penis and big tit beer bongs that he brought. It was a hit on the beach (especially during the Big Rock Show concert), and also the Lucky Bitch contest. Myself, I really enjoyed John Eddie and Band's (Forty, Lowlife) show. Check out their CD, 'Same Old Brand New Me'. I was able to get one of their setlists after the show, so I will post a pic of it when I can. We all worried about having shade on the beach, but turns out you could rent a 1/2 shell cover for 17$ if you didn't get a cabana in the lottery. It was overcast and rainy some of the time :(. During the Q and A session with KR, he said he doesn't enjoy the pic taking sessions because it has to go very fast, and it seems impersonal. You really got the feeling that he would like to sit down and chat with ppl, but it just isn't possible. He is such a kind, soft-hearted man. He teared up when a soldier who had completed 8 tours presented him with a flag flown in his honor overseas (actually we all cried.) Later, the soldier girl was sitting in the diningroom with us, and the whole room erupted into cheers and claps for her. Mark, Cheryl's hubby, gave her a glass of bubbly. Late Sunday night, KR and crew were sitting with Yelawolf in the lounge area when John Stone Band was playing, and a little girl in jammies approached with family and asked for an autograph. You should have seen how much love shone from his eyes for that little one. KR had on custom-made overalls painted with all kinds of cool stuff, a couple pairs of them. You will see them in the pics. Someone asked KR if he ever thought about cutting his hair, and he said yes, that his Dad is bald :). Favorite late night snack? Pussy lol (and morning snack, he said.) His first car was a Ford Lynx .
(continued)
(continued)
The beach was beautiful. The sand was fine white powder and the ocean was crystal clear. Since Cedar, JB, and I had been originally on the wait list, we didn't have beach access at first for Kid's concert. We opted to just watch from the ocean. After all the beach access people were allowed in, security opened up the beach to anyone. Nearly all the ocean people stayed in place. Watching the concert from the water was fantastic. We just let our bucket of beer bob (pun intended) in the water and danced in the water. There wasn't a bad seat in the house. The sand kept shifting under our feet and we would have to adjust. It was a great leg workout. A lady behind us stood on a float for most of the concert. At one point, a white boat tugged a parasailer behind where the ocean concert goers stood. The Bahamian men on the boat danced on board and we all cheered. Kid stopped the concert and told everyone to wave to the parasailer. We all turned around and did. It was surreal.
I'm going to speak on behalf of the three of us. WE HAD AN AMAZING TIME. We laughed until we cried (or peed) and just tried to DO IT ALL. We never went to bed before 5 a.m. and managed on 2 hours of sleep. We spent every night in the casino, dancing on the promenade. For the life of me, I CANNOT understand why the promenade concerts were not held in the disco. It made perfect sense to me to have it there, especially on disco night. We were packed like sardines in the casino area. Not much room to dance while the disco was dead (pun intended).
Speaking of casino, we watched Bob play craps at the tables. A woman next to me tried to get a picture and his security guard put a stop to it immediately. Man, they really do have his back. We watched from a distance and just took it all in. I spoke to a man on the plane ride back and he knew one of the guys at the table. He said the guy kept playing (and losing) because he didn't want to walk away from the fun at the tab
I have never laughed so much
I have never laughed so much in my lifetime. Cedar, JB, and I had the time of our lives. When we had our picture taken with Bob, Cedar and JB just clammed up on me. I ended up doing all the talking. Immediately after the picture, we were near the bar, talking about what had just happened and my hands began shaking like crazy. I had told Bob we three became friends because of him and he said he hoped we would have a good time. WE CERTAINLY DID!
It's the day after the cruise and I still feel like I'm on the boat. I asked my SO wonderful husband (he's made five breakfasts, packed or made five lunches, ordered take out for dinner five times, shuttled the kids around, AND did three loads of laundry while I was away) if the house was rocking back and forth. As I sit here typing, I am still feeling the rocking a bit. Luckily, none of us got seasick. I felt sorry for the tattoo artists who did. I spoke with artist Ron (I think that was his name) and he told me he got sick from doing all the detail work on the tats while the boat swayed.
Back to the cruise---we tried to see every show we could. We totally loved the John Stone band. John is a big teddy bear of guy and his band members are very sweet. Paradime's show was near the same time as the Redneck Paradise premiere. I didn't want to cut out of Paradime's show like other people had so I stayed to support him. I missed most of the video on the Lido deck. I hope it's posted here for all to see. Kracker put on a great show one night. We did Kracker Bingo and the band was hilarious. It was hard to concentrate on the numbers, because the band was cracking us up. Kracker's last concert will most likely be a separate discussion. Most people on board were good about it. We all just sang along and tried to help him out with the words. Some people left early but honestly, I laughed until I cried because it was just so funny. I will definitely never forget that one.
Thanks for the recap Val,
Thanks for the recap Val, sounds like a great time was had! A video for his new song "Redneck Paradise"...so cool for ya'll to be involved in that! Probably was a smart idea Val, not to indulge too much, otherwise you waste the day sleeping off a hangover & I saw on your post your tab was only $300...that's reasonable. Yeah I feel bad for KR too, kinda being put on display with the picture thing, but it's probably better to get all the pics done at once than have to put up with people trying to get a pic with ya the whole cruise. Glad you had fun Val :)
They did film clips from the
They did film clips from the sail away concert on the cruise first night, and of the concert on the island Sat. for a video of the song 'Redneck Paradise'. There was a preview of the video Sunday night, (which I missed b/c I did not want to rush from the Paradime concert that was taking place--KR!!! Heck, man! timing!!) Paradime was nice enuf to sign my LP from 1999 of his that night :))))) Thanks Freddy.
I'm so tired right now, but I will try to hit a recap...It's All About The Music (kinda ;) )...I LOVED the bands, and listening to them...that was the best and most relaxing part for me..laughin at their jokes in between, enjoying some great tunes and artists, throwing back a few. Hanging with my peeps from the D and beyond. There were activities galore to keep you busy if you wanted to be. We did Bingo with Kracker and Co., and a bike tour of the Half Moon Cay Island. Crazy ppl out till all hours of the night (and I do mean you are all crazy mfers.) The theme nights were hilarious....I never laughed so much in my life for many different reasons...luckily, I did not indulge too much as usual so got the most out of each day. Food and drinks available 24/7. I slept like a baby (but my nieces said I snored, lol) The band members were out and about; you saw them around everywhere. The Q and A with KR was the bestest...I cried my eyes out at some of the answers, and laughed at the rest. Pic with KR..very cool, surreal, nuts..felt sorry for him, hope he is used to the constant spotlight (and camera flashes.) Casino hot if that is what you are in to. Anyone else? :) A helluva good time. Hope I can stop swearing now that I am back home.